


Waking next to her, Thinking of you

by Sammy91



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-05
Updated: 2018-03-05
Packaged: 2019-03-27 07:25:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13876047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sammy91/pseuds/Sammy91
Summary: A romanced Garrus dies in the collector base. Jane Shepard seems by all accounts to be handling it as well as possible, even starting a relationship with Samantha Traynor.Then the war ends.





	1. Prologue

**Prologue**

 

 

 

“I can see the entrance!” Miranda called out in the cavernous halls of the collector base, voice cracking. “I need to... get there soon!”

 

Gunfire punctuated the screams and wails of husks, and Jane spared a strained half-smile towards Garrus as they pushed their way through the seeker swarms with the aid of Miranda's barrier. Miranda was right. She could see the doors – just a short sprint away but for these damned swarms.

 

“Hold on.” Shepard barked in her command voice. “We're almost there.”

 

“We need to get out of here, Shepard!” Garrus yelled.

 

“Alright, let's move.” Shepard sent a flurry of bullets towards the collector drones attempting to rush them as they got to the doors – she would have sent a biotic blast as well but she needed to reserve it for anything more dangerous further down the line – who knew what they'd find in the heart of the base. “They're pushing! Keep it up!”

 

“Hurry, Shepard!” Miranda ground out.

 

“Everyone! Through the doors! Now!” Shepard yelled,

 

“Hurry Shepard!” Miranda yelled again.

 

Shepard turned to see Garrus covering the doors with his fire, her eyes widened as she realised the precarious position he was in.

 

“No! Fall back!” But it was too late. Jane could only watch, horrified, as her best friend, lover, and the man she hadn't yet confessed her love to was carried off by the seeker swarms, with screams that would haunt her nightmares for the rest of her life.

 

“Garrus!” Shepard screamed.

 

 

 

 


	2. At the Bar

**The Bar**

 

Jane Shepard woke to a blinding navy blue room. The exact colour as... as Garrus's colony markings. Forcefully pushing that thought out of her mind as quickly as it had come, Shepard stood up, reaching for the non-existent pistol at her hip reflexively at the unfamiliar surroundings, wary at where she was being kept. She could see no doors, windows, or seams in the room at all. It was like it was made out of a morphing rubber that didn't let her eyes focus on it. She blinked her eyes to clear them – the last thing she remembered was walking past that damn machine child in the bowels of the Citadel, bleating about synthesising all life in the Galaxy, and blowing the whole damn thing to Kingdom Come. She remembered the flames licking over her as the Citadel crumbled around her, and then... nothing. Was she dead? She'd never been the religious type, but God, maybe... was he here?

 

“Garrus?” She called out, half-expecting Khalisah al-Jilani to leap out of nowhere and scream something at her about how stupid she was being. “I... Hello?”

 

Nothing happened for a long moment, long enough that she began to think – maybe he was in Turian Heaven. Or Galactic Heaven, who knew. But she'd let him die. Maybe she was in Hell. Dropping into a battle stance, Jane was just about to attempt a shockwave to get out of wherever she was being held – who knew where it was but surely they wouldn't let her into _anywhere good_ , even if she was dead, when the walls shimmered and a pathway appeared out of nowhere. Cautiously, Jane began to walk towards it. It looked like it headed to nowhere, but the further she walked, the more of the pathway appeared. She peered into the darkness around her, and the moment she looked away from the path she was there.

 

The bar resembled her Father's drinks bar in his study back on Mindoir. Almost eerily so in fact. As Shepard looked around, she realised she could recognise a few people. Her Mom, she had died in front of Jane, her twin John, and her younger siblings Samuel and Sarah – shot in the back by batarian slavers. John had been next, followed by her Dad as he rushed to shelter Sammy and Sarah. They were dead too of course – before they had reached their third birthday. That was Jane's only-just-developing biotics failing to block a bullet meant for her, that had killed them both in her arms.

 

_If this is truly the Afterlife, truly Heaven,and all these good people are here..._ Jane thought, sinking to the floor, panicked, _Then why am I here?_ She couldn't meet the concerned eyes of Mordin, Legion, her family, her squad, Thane,  _all the people I've failed_ , so she stared at their feet instead, and felt tears slipping down her face as it hit her that Mordin's feet were lightly dusted in sand.

 

She suddenly realised what this was leading to, as Legion helped her to her feet.

 

“No.” She whispered aloud. “No, I... Fuck.”

 

“Shepard-Commander. Please, come with me.”

 

Numb, Jane let herself be led towards the bar, all the people  _she has failed_ smiling sadly at her. She sees the back of his cowl sat at the bar, and closes her eyes as he begins to turn.

 

“If this is Heaven why does it feel so much like Hell?”

 

“Jane.” His dual-toned voice calls out to her, and his screams echo through her head again for the hundredth time as he talks, almost drowning out his words. “Shepard. Jane. Please listen to me.”

 

She's trying  _it's the least she owes him after getting him killed_ , but the screams are so loud she can only pick out words here and there.

 

“...Not yet. Stay alive... if not for me.... for them...Love you Jane.... Let go.”

 

Shepard finally raises her head to meet his eyes, afraid the beautiful blue will have been plucked out by the swarms, but... God. Garrus. She reaches out to him,  _at last she's home_ , but he puts his talons over her five-fingered hand, places them on her chest, and pushes her away, mandibles flaring in a smile at her. “Goodbye Jane.”

 

“ **CLEAR!** ” 

 


End file.
